You are the Universe

1794755_10156774813580224_3861629946822213468_nA lot happens in five hundred twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes. That many ago, I was all sorts of angry about the Religious Freedom Act being passed in the US, and used my birthday to amplify those feelings – loudly.

Ergo… a lot also doesn’t happen in five hundred twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes.

Funny that… and how life works… from the catapulting of compassion to the clichés of comfort…

Funny that that’s also how addiction works.

Any addiction.

At any level, and within or outside of any legitimacy.

It’s my birthday – or reborn-day as some would say – so here… I’ll start:

웃   I have been addicted to excellence, and only being seen as excellent.

웃   I have been addicted to peer-endorsement, and only being celebrated within the best of them.

웃   I have been addicted to social media, and addicted to how unsociable that media allows me to be.

웃   I have been addicted to wanting to heal those who look lost; and then those (who look) lost in self pity.

웃   I have been addicted to being lost, my own self pity, and then addicted to the feeling of losing myself in my own self-pity.

웃   I have been addicted to processing, unprocessing, and processing again within the polar opposites of both solemn soberness and substance-abuse.

웃   I have been addicted to going between the Light and dark of those polar opposites, and back again.

And again.

And again.

웃   I have been addicted to the again and again.

웃   I have been addicted to benevolence – and then fighting the bombing of its opposite.

웃   I have been addicted to how much noise I can make about how the bomb-opposite was such unacceptable bombing of my being.

Because, wouldn’t anyone?

Shouldn’t everyone?

To be bombed is to wake up in a world you hadn’t planned to wake up in.

Ergo…
…it’s the getting-used-to what looks like a war zone that is the real siren.

Sometimes, it’s the sound of that siren that we will not hear.

And then ‘I have been’ often really means ‘I am’. 

That’s how addiction works.

Any addiction.

At any level, and within or outside of any legitimacy.

Still…
All behaviour is beautiful – whether bent or bright – but only as long as we are learning what it is, where it comes from, and/or where it is we are going because of it.

And knowing that you are learning just one of these is fine. Well, to me, anyway.

And if you know more than one at any one time, then that’s the epitome of a moment – and you should marvel at its magnificence!

Don’t let your addictions scare you.

But don’t let your addictions succeed you either.

Because,

Here, this year’s bee-day ‘mixtape’ on sides A and B… For Perspective, and for Party – as and if you choose you’d like to.  😉

Be bold.
Be new.
Be you.
Keep walking.

۞

 

© Dylan Balkind

 

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